[He remembers. He doesn't have any emotions tied to that memory any more, but Machina does remember. But no snarky retort is forthcoming, no attitude, not even an annoyed snort. Lightning's house is safe from a repeat of before.
Flying over would be faster, but Machina opts for the mortal route instead, riding his work bike to the house. Once there, he stands at the front door spending his time thinking of the last time he was here. It was months ago. Before Snow left. Before Hope left. Remembering that they're gone just shores up his resolve to follow through on the course he's set his feet on. He's done with this world screwing with them and taking away friends and family.
[The door opens almost immediately. Lightning had seen him coming up the front steps but waited for him to knock, all while wondering what had taken him that long to finally do it. When they're face to face, she looks neither thrilled nor upset to see him. She'll wait until he tells her what he has to say before she decides which one it is.]
Took you long enough.
[To knock, not to get here. That's her greeting as she steps aside to give Machina room to enter if he still wishes to.]
[He does that a lot under normal circumstances, and it's only become worse in the recent months. Thinking too hard has always been a problematic behavior, but now he often drifts out of thought into emptiness. Waiting for a voice that doesn't come to him here. Even now, he's struggling to keep a grasp on who he is, at least enough to make his request.]
I won't be long.
[Can't take long. Same difference, yes? So he steps in the house but doesn't make a move to go past the entry. Instead, he just launches off with the pertinent information first before he drifts again.]
I want to ask you to look out for my brother. Please.
[She's already making her way down the hall to the kitchen by the time he blurts out his request, and when she turns on her heel to find that he isn't following behind her, she pauses mid-step and raises a brow.]
... You gonna come in, or you wanna have this conversation at the door?
[They will get back to his brother in a hot second, but no way is she standing around in the foyer like this. She's got a feeling there's more to it than just looking out for Izana and she fully intends to find out what it is.]
[Lots lots more to it and these days, Machina doesn't have much of a need to hide things. Or, he's got less fear and distrust driving being a sneak, anyway.]
Uh, yeah. Sorry.
[He'll pick up the pace to catch up. Still weird being here again.]
[Once in the kitchen, she pours him a glass of water which she slides across the counter towards him before grabbing a container of fruit from the fridge should he want to help himself to a snack, too. They have an abundance, so why not? She doesn't pour herself any, nor does she make a grab for the fresh strawberries. Instead, Lightning drums her fingers once on the counter.]
So, you gonna tell me why you want me to look out for your brother?
[The water he takes with a grateful nod, while the fruit gets a curious glance. It's certainly tempting but what he's here for is more important than indulging the bottomless pit of his teen stomach.]
I...I might have found a way to keep him here, and Lady Serah. I don't know if it'll work, but I have to try.
[He looks Lightning square on in the face with the same intense seriousness as always. What Machina's not saying is what he plans to do is potentially very dangerous, but he doesn't care. Consequences be damned.]
I know you out of anyone will understand: I will do anything to keep Izana alive. And... there is no one on the island I trust more with him than you.
[Because more than Sora or Hizumi or even Regis, there's no one he knows who can understand the need to keep a beloved sibling alive, and have the strength to see it done.]
[Something else flickers across Lightning's expression – curiosity, with maybe a little bit of fear. For so long, she had been searching for an answer as to why people would come and go the way they did, and why some returned with their memories and others didn't. After Serah and Gladio returned without theirs, she had given up the search and concentrated her efforts on making the most of her time with them instead. All of that stopped mattering... until now.
There's one thing about this that concerns her, though... but first things first.
She folds her arms. Forgive her if she seems a little... distrustful.]
['We', meaning Machina has an accomplice in this act and their plan is to take them all on. Probably insanely arrogant of them but Machina doesn't care. Not anymore. Not that he can exactly feel caring, but he. is. Done. Friends have nagged him for months now to just enjoy life here and what's that gotten him? More people come and gone, more loss. Standing still and doing nothing, pretending everything is just fine? No. Not anymore.]
They can go too loving and freeze the damn island, or think there's some spiffy lost toy they want in a temple and for our help, we get to relieve horrific nightmares from our lives. Porom adored one and she's gone now too. They can't be trusted. They're monsters and we intend to force them to stop screwing with us.
[The kitchen lights buzz and flicker and if her hands had been anywhere but folded over her chest, a red spark might have crossed the counter towards his glass and perhaps shattered it.
That hadn't been where he was expecting to go with this – she thought that maybe it meant that he had found someone who could answer those questions. Going so far as killing an Arehtei, it's almost laughable. She doesn't laugh, but it earns a scoff out of her.
Like hell she actually believes it.]
Tch. Yeah, you and what army?
[AKA: who are the other idiots in on this genius plan?]
A woman I met and some of her friends. Her name is Velvet.
[Any other time Machina would be having a hissy fit at having his capabilities questioned in the slightest. Instead, he's just eerily calm about it. Frank and honest because he sees no purpose in lying or hiding anymore.]
You're welcome to help or not. That's not what I came here for anyway. I want to make sure that Izana is safe and unharmed.
[He looks directly at Lightning, with empty eyes but there's an intensity behind the action of not looking away, being unflinching.]
Unharmed by anyone or anything.
[Machina knows, he knows that the greatest potential threat to his brother's life is himself. Without a Crystal or seize control of him, jerk his leash, force him to act... it's a far lesser threat. But as his brother pointed out months ago, he's a danger to everyone from Rubrum now.]
[Velvet... Lightning commits that name to memory, tucking that piece of information away for later in the event that she needs it. Even with that, she's having a hard time believing that any of this is true or that they could pull it off if it is. That still doesn't stop her from taking a warning step towards Machina, and although she tries to maintain a calmer demeanor, the light above their heads flickers again.]
I don't know what you think you're doing, but it's stupid. [Ah, here comes the Real Talk.] I've seen people do a lot of stupid things and this is right up there, so if you think you can take on an Arehtei and come out of it long enough to see your brother stick around, then you're out of your mind.
... I'm not getting involved in whatever plan you've got, but I keep my word. I'll keep an eye on your brother, but what do you think'll happen to you?
[Maybe it is stupid, but it's all he's got right now, and doing nothing at all is driving him mad. Although surprisingly enough, Machina doesn't get huffy or pissy or anything at being called out on his crap. There's nothing from him in response, because he's so far gone, over two years since he was branded, that his feelings have finally surrendered as payment for power.]
I don't know. That's the problem. Maybe I get killed in the process and he jumps in to try to stop it. He has done stuff like that before. Or...
I am a White Tiger l'Cie. Izana is the only person left here from Rubrum. I've been ordered to kill my own people before and I've done it. I couldn't stop myself.
[It was horrifying to move as a living weapon and be powerless to stop himself.]
It might not matter. The Crystal isn't here; I would know if it were. But I know that I almost killed Sora once because I lost control.
Then don't think for a second that I won't come for you if it really does come down to it. If you want me to protect your brother, that means protecting him from your l'Cie ass, too.
[Not that she thinks they'll succeed at all, of course. Or will even go through with the plan ha ha she's in for a surprise! but Lightning expects him to take that warning (more like threat) very seriously. She means every word.]
That's what I'm counting on, and why I came to you.
[He doesn't doubt for one moment that Lightning will follow through. And that's what he needs to know, that she's willing to stop him if Izana is put at risk. Sora won't, and there's very few others on the island even capable of the attempt.]
[With her face so close to his, Lightning's eyes narrow further before she stands up straight. She doesn't want his gratitude or reassurance that anyone is doing the right thing. She isn't doing this to be heroic, but because it's the right thing to do. If what Machina says is true, then there will be a lot more in danger than just his brother, but Lightning will believe it when she sees it.
Nothing in this conversation is giving her the answers she wants or needs, but it's too damn early for this.]
Don't thank me. Not yet.
[There's just one more thing...]
You so much as snap a hair on the heads of anyone I care about, you'll be dealing with something worse than the Arehtei.
That's what I want. But I won't. I gave you my word that I'd protect them.
[Unfortunately for Machina, asserting that he wants to be stopped pushes up against his Focus in a dangerous way. Not enough to turn Cie'th, but certainly a way to subvert the will of the Crystal. And it wouldn't be the first time he's been brainjacked for skirting disobedience.
His eyes glaze over, empty but at the same time, haunted. He remembers too well what he was doing when he was brought to this place. The sound of the Crystal demanding that he kill. The feel of his limbs moving to obey against his dwindling heart screaming out not to. The blood, the screams, the sick sensation of ending a life, pulling their phantoma from their bodies.
It's from that distant place, that that Machina's true self lingers. The too kind and earnest boy, overwhelmed and desperate grabbing for anything he could to not be alone. That child's been effectivly smothered, except even now he's railing against the inevitable.]
I don't want to hurt anyone else.
[He's blank-faced and not present in the here and now, but his iron will asserts itself in the grip on his glass. It tightens and tightens until the glass shatters, slicing his hand open. Machina doesn't flinch. Hell, he doesn't even realize he's cut himself and he's bleeding.]
[Lightning doesn't flinch at the sound of the glass breaking, but she does cast it a very lacklustre look. Another one bites the dust... this isn't the first time a dish has been broken so that isn't the part that makes her uneasy. What does is the fact that he seems impassive about it. She rips a napkin free for him and holds it out, her gaze not once straying from his face.]
Then don't. You don't have to hurt anyone to find answers.
[If Machina's hand hasn't moved away by now, she'll nudge it so she can start cleaning up the shards of glass.]
It makes you no better than them, and I know you don't want that either.
[It's only when Lightning nudges his hand does Machina startle enough into awareness to look at his hand. He holds it out, looking at it, yet not seeing it or really registering that he's gone and cut his hand. The sound of glass being pushed together to be cleaned does register with him and he glances to Lightning, then the hand. A napkin for... oh.
He presses it into the cut hand and casts Cura on it. But it's still just working through the motions.
But lest Lightning think he hadn't heard her...]
It wasn't so bad at first, being a l'Cie. I used it to walk behind enemy lines with impunity, brought intel back to my country.
[Great news, Lightning, the teenager in your house isn't just a l'Cie, he's a spy!]
But then he Crystal forbade me from taking action against Milites. So I ditched on deployments. Let everyone think I was a flake. Then... it demanded I defend the capital. Ordered me to kill my own people. And I did. It... I couldn't stop myself. I butchered them.
What I want doesn't matter anymore. I'm better than no one.
But, I have to try. While I've got will left to myself, I have to do something.
[Something about becoming a l'Cie 'not being so bad' makes her jaw tense, but Lightning remains silent, listening as she sweeps the broken glass off the counter and into the trash. When he finishes, the lid of the bin slams shut.]
You butchered your people back home. What makes you think this is different?
[Her words are sharp, meant to cut through whatever wall he's putting up between them. They may be Arehtei, and some people might think they're false gods, but there is nothing safe about this plan of his. People are inevitably going to get hurt, whether that's Machina, the Arehtei, or those who try to protect them...]
Your line's looking a little blurry.
[She breathes a tired sigh because they're just talking in circles now. No matter what he says to her from here on out isn't going to change how stupid she thinks he sounds, or the fact that he can or will even go through with it in the end. She wants to believe that he'll do the right thing and make the choice that won't hurt others, but she'll be keeping a closer eye on things starting now.]
You should go. [But she gives him one last warning before he can so much as turn to walk away.] People are gonna get hurt no matter what you do. It's tough, but that's life. We all have to learn to live with it.
[And he will, in the form of a whole new set purchased from his income. His humanity is lost, but there remains a stern sense of right and wrong. Unfortunately that sense is easily manipulated by others.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
sparkstrikes) wrote2023-01-01 12:11 pm
no subject
Flying over would be faster, but Machina opts for the mortal route instead, riding his work bike to the house. Once there, he stands at the front door spending his time thinking of the last time he was here. It was months ago. Before Snow left. Before Hope left. Remembering that they're gone just shores up his resolve to follow through on the course he's set his feet on. He's done with this world screwing with them and taking away friends and family.
Knock knock, someone at the door.]
no subject
Took you long enough.
[To knock, not to get here. That's her greeting as she steps aside to give Machina room to enter if he still wishes to.]
no subject
[He does that a lot under normal circumstances, and it's only become worse in the recent months. Thinking too hard has always been a problematic behavior, but now he often drifts out of thought into emptiness. Waiting for a voice that doesn't come to him here. Even now, he's struggling to keep a grasp on who he is, at least enough to make his request.]
I won't be long.
[Can't take long. Same difference, yes? So he steps in the house but doesn't make a move to go past the entry. Instead, he just launches off with the pertinent information first before he drifts again.]
I want to ask you to look out for my brother. Please.
no subject
... You gonna come in, or you wanna have this conversation at the door?
[They will get back to his brother in a hot second, but no way is she standing around in the foyer like this. She's got a feeling there's more to it than just looking out for Izana and she fully intends to find out what it is.]
no subject
Uh, yeah. Sorry.
[He'll pick up the pace to catch up. Still weird being here again.]
no subject
So, you gonna tell me why you want me to look out for your brother?
[Getting right to the point.]
no subject
I...I might have found a way to keep him here, and Lady Serah. I don't know if it'll work, but I have to try.
[He looks Lightning square on in the face with the same intense seriousness as always. What Machina's not saying is what he plans to do is potentially very dangerous, but he doesn't care. Consequences be damned.]
I know you out of anyone will understand: I will do anything to keep Izana alive. And... there is no one on the island I trust more with him than you.
[Because more than Sora or Hizumi or even Regis, there's no one he knows who can understand the need to keep a beloved sibling alive, and have the strength to see it done.]
no subject
There's one thing about this that concerns her, though... but first things first.
She folds her arms. Forgive her if she seems a little... distrustful.]
What is it? This idea you have?
no subject
['We', meaning Machina has an accomplice in this act and their plan is to take them all on. Probably insanely arrogant of them but Machina doesn't care. Not anymore. Not that he can exactly feel caring, but he. is. Done. Friends have nagged him for months now to just enjoy life here and what's that gotten him? More people come and gone, more loss. Standing still and doing nothing, pretending everything is just fine? No. Not anymore.]
They can go too loving and freeze the damn island, or think there's some spiffy lost toy they want in a temple and for our help, we get to relieve horrific nightmares from our lives. Porom adored one and she's gone now too. They can't be trusted. They're monsters and we intend to force them to stop screwing with us.
no subject
That hadn't been where he was expecting to go with this – she thought that maybe it meant that he had found someone who could answer those questions. Going so far as killing an Arehtei, it's almost laughable. She doesn't laugh, but it earns a scoff out of her.
Like hell she actually believes it.]
Tch. Yeah, you and what army?
[AKA: who are the other idiots in on this genius plan?]
no subject
[Any other time Machina would be having a hissy fit at having his capabilities questioned in the slightest. Instead, he's just eerily calm about it. Frank and honest because he sees no purpose in lying or hiding anymore.]
You're welcome to help or not. That's not what I came here for anyway. I want to make sure that Izana is safe and unharmed.
[He looks directly at Lightning, with empty eyes but there's an intensity behind the action of not looking away, being unflinching.]
Unharmed by anyone or anything.
[Machina knows, he knows that the greatest potential threat to his brother's life is himself. Without a Crystal or seize control of him, jerk his leash, force him to act... it's a far lesser threat. But as his brother pointed out months ago, he's a danger to everyone from Rubrum now.]
Please.
no subject
I don't know what you think you're doing, but it's stupid. [Ah, here comes the Real Talk.] I've seen people do a lot of stupid things and this is right up there, so if you think you can take on an Arehtei and come out of it long enough to see your brother stick around, then you're out of your mind.
... I'm not getting involved in whatever plan you've got, but I keep my word. I'll keep an eye on your brother, but what do you think'll happen to you?
no subject
I don't know. That's the problem. Maybe I get killed in the process and he jumps in to try to stop it. He has done stuff like that before. Or...
I am a White Tiger l'Cie. Izana is the only person left here from Rubrum. I've been ordered to kill my own people before and I've done it. I couldn't stop myself.
[It was horrifying to move as a living weapon and be powerless to stop himself.]
It might not matter. The Crystal isn't here; I would know if it were. But I know that I almost killed Sora once because I lost control.
no subject
Then don't think for a second that I won't come for you if it really does come down to it. If you want me to protect your brother, that means protecting him from your l'Cie ass, too.
[Not that she thinks they'll succeed at all, of course. Or will even go through with the plan
ha ha she's in for a surprise!but Lightning expects him to take that warning (more like threat) very seriously. She means every word.]no subject
[He doesn't doubt for one moment that Lightning will follow through. And that's what he needs to know, that she's willing to stop him if Izana is put at risk. Sora won't, and there's very few others on the island even capable of the attempt.]
Thank you.
no subject
Nothing in this conversation is giving her the answers she wants or needs, but it's too damn early for this.]
Don't thank me. Not yet.
[There's just one more thing...]
You so much as snap a hair on the heads of anyone I care about, you'll be dealing with something worse than the Arehtei.
no subject
[Unfortunately for Machina, asserting that he wants to be stopped pushes up against his Focus in a dangerous way. Not enough to turn Cie'th, but certainly a way to subvert the will of the Crystal. And it wouldn't be the first time he's been brainjacked for skirting disobedience.
His eyes glaze over, empty but at the same time, haunted. He remembers too well what he was doing when he was brought to this place. The sound of the Crystal demanding that he kill. The feel of his limbs moving to obey against his dwindling heart screaming out not to. The blood, the screams, the sick sensation of ending a life, pulling their phantoma from their bodies.
It's from that distant place, that that Machina's true self lingers. The too kind and earnest boy, overwhelmed and desperate grabbing for anything he could to not be alone. That child's been effectivly smothered, except even now he's railing against the inevitable.]
I don't want to hurt anyone else.
[He's blank-faced and not present in the here and now, but his iron will asserts itself in the grip on his glass. It tightens and tightens until the glass shatters, slicing his hand open. Machina doesn't flinch. Hell, he doesn't even realize he's cut himself and he's bleeding.]
no subject
Then don't. You don't have to hurt anyone to find answers.
[If Machina's hand hasn't moved away by now, she'll nudge it so she can start cleaning up the shards of glass.]
It makes you no better than them, and I know you don't want that either.
no subject
He presses it into the cut hand and casts Cura on it. But it's still just working through the motions.
But lest Lightning think he hadn't heard her...]
It wasn't so bad at first, being a l'Cie. I used it to walk behind enemy lines with impunity, brought intel back to my country.
[Great news, Lightning, the teenager in your house isn't just a l'Cie, he's a spy!]
But then he Crystal forbade me from taking action against Milites. So I ditched on deployments. Let everyone think I was a flake. Then... it demanded I defend the capital. Ordered me to kill my own people. And I did. It... I couldn't stop myself. I butchered them.
What I want doesn't matter anymore. I'm better than no one.
But, I have to try. While I've got will left to myself, I have to do something.
no subject
You butchered your people back home. What makes you think this is different?
[Her words are sharp, meant to cut through whatever wall he's putting up between them. They may be Arehtei, and some people might think they're false gods, but there is nothing safe about this plan of his. People are inevitably going to get hurt, whether that's Machina, the Arehtei, or those who try to protect them...]
Your line's looking a little blurry.
[She breathes a tired sigh because they're just talking in circles now. No matter what he says to her from here on out isn't going to change how stupid she thinks he sounds, or the fact that he can or will even go through with it in the end. She wants to believe that he'll do the right thing and make the choice that won't hurt others, but she'll be keeping a closer eye on things starting now.]
You should go. [But she gives him one last warning before he can so much as turn to walk away.] People are gonna get hurt no matter what you do. It's tough, but that's life. We all have to learn to live with it.
no subject
[And he will, in the form of a whole new set purchased from his income. His humanity is lost, but there remains a stern sense of right and wrong. Unfortunately that sense is easily manipulated by others.]
But thank you. I mean it.